cyrano | But what I really want to know is

His name's not Warren?

(Sorry, I gots nothin' today.)

I don't feel that I need to explain my art to you, Warren.

Ooo!

Who are you?

(We'll do this all day, since apparently I'm not getting any work done. Also, see icon for extra humor value.)

That's a tiny question with a lot of answer packed inside it. And it makes me think the next question is "What do you want?" because I have B5 on the brain.
I am a lot of who. And a lot of it depends on the context of the question being asked. When the IRS asks, I'm a wordsmith. When a stranger in a dark alley asks, I'm Batman. I'm account number 455 67 5789. Sometimes, I am the Walrus.
But at the heart of the question, I think I'm a reflection of the Divine, a facet on the jewel of the Inifinite. Just like you.

You are NOT the Walrus. I hit him with my car yesterday.

Here's a bunch, since I don't have to work again for an hour.

Why do really bad things happen in threes?
Why do I always forget the great questions?
Why is the Red Green Show good?
Why do all teenagers want to play guitar?
Why do we crave absolutes?
Why are absolutes impossible to achieve?
What is the meaning of life? (If you answer 42, I will throw a snit and not speak to you.)

I can answer one of these questions.....
The Red Green Show has been known to have Grahm Green :)
He blows stuff up. He kicks ass.
mmmmmmmm..... Thunderheart.... I should watch that again soon.

Troublemaker. You're just lucky I wasn't the Walrus when you hit him.

Um. Bad things happen in threes--one for each infernal head of the unholy trinity; Bob Saget, Ayn Rand, and that guy at the deli that can never get my sandwich right and always puts tomatoes on it. Misfortune is their demesne, and each commands one of the bad things in your set. The fun part is deciding which pair up.
You forget the great questions for the same reason that babies forget how to talk with animals: because God doesn't want you getting uppity, and so he toys with you in order to keep you humiliated and crushed.
The Red Green show is good because it's the colors of Christmas, and anything to do with Christmas is good. Witness the spectacular goodness of the Star Wars Holiday Special which without the Christmas (and a fifth of vodka applied judiciously) would be a steaming pile. Also, the Red Green show is Canadian.
I don't know about girls, but teenage boys want to play guitar because it's a huge metaphoric phallus. Chicks dig guitars, which may or may not have anything to do with the first part, but it does make boys want to learn.
We crave absolutes because they are, in their way, perfection--completeness and wholeness. This is the same reason we cannot achieve them. But their shiny surface draws us, regardless.
The meaning of life, which is probably different from its purpose, is, at least among higher chordates, a heartbeat. Growth, digestion, excretion, reproduction, these are in combination usually enough to mean life as well.

Okay, as referenced elsewhere.

If we win the War on Terror(TM), will they actually tell us?

The exquisite thing about the War on Terror is its tendency to produce more Terror. Much like the War on Drugs, its big selling point here is the fervor of Unending War. Thus there is no reason to ever suspect that we have any hope of winning, so long as we continue to treat it like a conventional war that we should shoot at.

Unending War. Is that related to Permanent Revolution? Kissing cousins, maybe?

Permanent Revolution has, with this administration, the added deliciousness of oxymoronity--a revolution in which nothing ever changes and the status quo remains undisturbed. But essentially, the underlying similarity remains. If I found UW and PR making out in the bushes behind the horse barn I would tell both their mothers on them.

Or did you, perhaps, mean to refer to the 'War on Terroir', which I can only hope and pray that we win?

Uh, no. Do you actually drink wine?

I don't. I haven't found a vintage that doesn't give me a bitter aftertaste. Or somtimes a bitter duringtaste.

Given that true intellectual and emotional compatability
Are at the very least difficult
If not impossible to come by
We could always opt for the more temporal gratification
Of sheer physical attraction
That wouldn't make you a shallow person
Would it?

While it does not *make* you shallow, it make be a warning indicator that you are a shallow person. Absolutes are dangerous and tricky--occasionally opting for strictly physical gratification is, in my opinion, not an unworthy path.

What is your deepest desire?

I started off thinking peace. Then I decided that happiness was better. But I think Love is probably the overall winner here.
Or a PlayStation III.

What would be a good thing to have for dinner?

Are you moved into your dorm room yet? If the cafeteria has fish then that would be excellent. Possibly some fried okra with it. mmmmm.
Or pizza--I haven't had pizza in months and craves it.

I wasn't around on Friday so I didn't get to ask a question... but I still have one.

Why did you decide to start a Livejournal?

Initially, the desire was (lo these four and a half years ago) mostly to have a place where people could keep up to date with my life. Also so I could have a bully pulpit, someplace to say clever things that occurred to me. And if I ever have anything clever to say, then my LJ is patiently waiting.

But what I really want to know is

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Can I play?

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Re: Can I play?

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