What a difference a day makes

I have spent the last few days slowly disintegrating, because I haven't been able to get any real sleep. I have been having dreams that are not nightmares because they're not scary but dreams where I have some stressful job to do and then I do that twilight slide between stressful dream and lying in bed all stressed out. I was heavily dissociating, and I was going without meds because refilling my pill caddies stresses me out under the best of conditions because I'm afraid I'm going to fuck it up and end up accidentally ODing. So I repeatedly noped out of that job.

And last night (well, this morning, because I slept miserably until about three or four) I finally got some quality unconscious time. The transformation is fucking amazing. Never take your sleep for granted. Don't let yourself get pinched by not getting enough. I know I'm privileged in being able to say this because I *can* ignore the alarm clock, but dear god the difference is *so* stark.