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Getting this down
Aug. 13th, 2021 01:05 pmIn case a therapist ever asks me about these nights.
I was trying to relax so I could go to sleep and apparently I tried so hard I gave myself a migraine.
That started the fugue 'yes I'm awake yes I'm asleep' fugue with the attendant high anxiety dream like state. I at least had people on My Side, and none of them were killed off while I helplessly stood by. But there were lots of people aggressively trying to get me to fuck up, or to make it look like I had. Nonstop I am in peril.
So going to bed was exhausting.
Around eight in the morning the room got lighter, and I think that led to less hostile dreams. At ten I heard John say my name three rooms away and woke up.
I was trying to relax so I could go to sleep and apparently I tried so hard I gave myself a migraine.
That started the fugue 'yes I'm awake yes I'm asleep' fugue with the attendant high anxiety dream like state. I at least had people on My Side, and none of them were killed off while I helplessly stood by. But there were lots of people aggressively trying to get me to fuck up, or to make it look like I had. Nonstop I am in peril.
So going to bed was exhausting.
Around eight in the morning the room got lighter, and I think that led to less hostile dreams. At ten I heard John say my name three rooms away and woke up.