cyrano | Fuckin' with spammers again

Got another one of those "boy do I have a lot of money and all I want to do is give it to you" spams. But this one assumes a certain... familiarity that I have not seen before.

From: "Adrein Jones" <adjones099@hotmail.co.uk> Add to Address BookAdd to Address Book Add Mobile Alert
Subject: Transaction completed **Compensation for your efforts***
Date: Thu, 30 Nov 2006 20:48:31 +0000

Dear Trusted Partner,

You might find it so difficult to remember me. Though,
it is indeed, a very long time. On my singular, I am much
delighted and privileged to contact you again, after
couple of years now. It takes fate, courage and God's
fearing to remember old friends and at the same time,
to show gratification to them, despite circumstances
that made things, not worked out as we projected then.

I take this liberty to inform you that, the
transaction we were pursing together, finally worked
out by God's infinite mercy and I decided to contact
you, just to let you know i have conscience as a
human and considering your tremendious effort and
contributions financially and morally to make things
work out in that respect.

Meanwhile, I must inform you that, I am presently in
Luxemburg for numerous business negotiations and
establishment.

I arrived three nights ago and checked into a
hotel and decided to mail you. Now, with my sincere heart, I
have raised and signed an International Cashier's Bank
Draft, to the tune of USD$520,000.00 ( FIVE HUNDRED
AND TWENTY THOUSAND DECIMAL ZERO-
ZERO UNITED STATES DOLLARS) only in your name as
COMPENSATION for your dedication, humanity and
contribution, as it were.

I could not send the draft across to you considering the fact
that you might have changed your home address. Now,
contact now my secretary to post you the draft:

Name: Tony Puzo
E-mail: typuzo@aol.com

You are to forward to him, the following:

1. YOUR FULL NAME & CURRENT HOME ADDRESS
2. YOUR DIRECT MOBILE TELEPHONE NUMBER

He, will advise you further about the shipment of
the ICBD to the Residence or Office Address you may
provide.

Please, do let me know immediately you receive it so
that we can share the Joy after all the sufferings, and
stress at that time, i am very busy here Because of the
investment projects which me and the new partner are
having At hand, finally, remember that i had forwarded
instruction to the secretary On your behalf to release
the cashier bank draft to you, so feel free to get
In touch with him, and he will send the bank draft to
you without any Delay.

Most importantly, the ICBD has only validity period of 15
banking days.

So, your early response to that effect, shall be
admired. You have to mind the days on
route shipment.

Sincerely Yours,
Adrein Jones.

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Here's my response.

Adrein:
God be praised, in his infinite names. How could I forget the work we did in Libya and Egypt, although I am certainly surprised to hear you going by the name "Adrien" these days--after she left you, and in such a flambuoyant fashion, I would not think you would want to be reminded.
It is a stroke of luck that you are in Luxembourg, as I am currently at the Hague for 'business related' reasons. There's no need to trouble Tony (Is this the same Tony that you told me so much about in Djibouti?) as I can just stop by your hotel myself. Which one are you staying at? If nothing else, I should like to get together and talk old times. I promise to bring some of those "special chocolates" you like so much, and we can enjoy them together. It will be like we never left Alexandria!

Sala'am Aleichm
Cyrano "Jones"

Oops. I forgot to blur out Adrien's or Tony's real email addresses. Please, do not (even if you're feeling especially puckish) send mail to either of them unless you have a business or a personal relationship with them. I would hate to see them deluged with mail.