Still breathin' but you don't know why
Aug. 6th, 2002 11:22 pmIt's kind of disappointing to see how quickly something I was feeling proud of can go utterly and completely to shambles when a single lynch-pin gets pulled.
Today I took the convertible to the Honda dealership so's the mighty housemate could get her car worked over, and she went to work with it.
I went to work too, and after work we went to pick her car up again.
So far so good. But I hadn't brought any CDs with me, and had to resort to listening to the radio on the way back from the dealer.
The radio, as it is wont to, has a multitude of stations broadcasting on it. Every single playlist was full of either talking, adverts, boring music, hateful music, or some combination of the above. And I'm not yet at the point where I trust myself to look away from the road to fiddle with dials knobs and whatnot while I'm driving. I panicked, I felt under attack, and every single insecurity about driving that I'd pushed to the back dove up again. I'm not certain what route I took to get home any more; I've pretty much forgotten it. But it certainly wasn't optimal in any sense of the word.
I think I'll make certain, in the future, that there's one of those little CD books in the glove compartment of the car.
And those of you who encourage my driving and are discouraged by my sour replies, please know it's nothing personal. And please know that I was feeling better about driving, and that I do realize how much more convenient access to a car is compared to public transport and making other people responsible for my location. And I also realize the effort that many of you have put into seeing that I got to where I am now, and don't think I don't appreciate it.
Today I took the convertible to the Honda dealership so's the mighty housemate could get her car worked over, and she went to work with it.
I went to work too, and after work we went to pick her car up again.
So far so good. But I hadn't brought any CDs with me, and had to resort to listening to the radio on the way back from the dealer.
The radio, as it is wont to, has a multitude of stations broadcasting on it. Every single playlist was full of either talking, adverts, boring music, hateful music, or some combination of the above. And I'm not yet at the point where I trust myself to look away from the road to fiddle with dials knobs and whatnot while I'm driving. I panicked, I felt under attack, and every single insecurity about driving that I'd pushed to the back dove up again. I'm not certain what route I took to get home any more; I've pretty much forgotten it. But it certainly wasn't optimal in any sense of the word.
I think I'll make certain, in the future, that there's one of those little CD books in the glove compartment of the car.
And those of you who encourage my driving and are discouraged by my sour replies, please know it's nothing personal. And please know that I was feeling better about driving, and that I do realize how much more convenient access to a car is compared to public transport and making other people responsible for my location. And I also realize the effort that many of you have put into seeing that I got to where I am now, and don't think I don't appreciate it.
no subject
Date: 2002-08-07 11:47 am (UTC)You had a set back, it's not terminal.
no subject
Date: 2002-08-07 08:13 pm (UTC)After the fact, of course, that sounded like a fine idea. I had the tuner on 102.1 for a while, whichever one that is, and they talked and talked and talked and talked and then there were adverts and then they talked and they talked and I went completely mad and shouted at the radio, which actually helped a bit.