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cyranoThere's nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.
For a long time, I have been thinking. There's a theory that the world gives you what you expect.
If you expect people to be stupid and mean and selfish then they will be glad to oblige you in that and you will live in a dark and cynical world.
If you expect people to be generous, thoughtful, kind and loving, they will again rise to meet your expectations. And you will live in a world full of sunshine and fluffy puppies.
You'll never guess which world I live in.
But I've met people who seem to be living in that other world. People who seem to go through life with an upturned face and a smile, who are graced with good fortune and do indeed turn lemons into lemonade.
And I sometimes wonder what would happen if I could trust the world not to kick me in the teeth long enough to drop my arms and find out what it was like in that other world. But it's pretty scary to try. Especially when I consider that it may not be the Point of View that determines the world--the cause may be the environment, and the effect may be the mood. People may be optimistic and friendly because they live in a world that makes them comfortable, and trying to live in it will just get me knocked around by the one I live in.
I make an effort to play the PollyAnna, to see the silver lining in the cloud in Bhopal; I try to make an effort to keep the good things in my life in the forefront of my considerations, and to keep my perspective from becoming too dimmed by a fascination with the venal and destructive in the world. But if I really want to change the world I live in, it's only a half-assed ring toss. If I think that change is possible, and that I could survive the transition, I'd have to try a lot harder and do a lot scarier things.
If you live in that world, don't get the Welcome Wagon ready just yet. It may be a little while before the new neighbor moves in.
For a long time, I have been thinking. There's a theory that the world gives you what you expect.
If you expect people to be stupid and mean and selfish then they will be glad to oblige you in that and you will live in a dark and cynical world.
If you expect people to be generous, thoughtful, kind and loving, they will again rise to meet your expectations. And you will live in a world full of sunshine and fluffy puppies.
You'll never guess which world I live in.
But I've met people who seem to be living in that other world. People who seem to go through life with an upturned face and a smile, who are graced with good fortune and do indeed turn lemons into lemonade.
And I sometimes wonder what would happen if I could trust the world not to kick me in the teeth long enough to drop my arms and find out what it was like in that other world. But it's pretty scary to try. Especially when I consider that it may not be the Point of View that determines the world--the cause may be the environment, and the effect may be the mood. People may be optimistic and friendly because they live in a world that makes them comfortable, and trying to live in it will just get me knocked around by the one I live in.
I make an effort to play the PollyAnna, to see the silver lining in the cloud in Bhopal; I try to make an effort to keep the good things in my life in the forefront of my considerations, and to keep my perspective from becoming too dimmed by a fascination with the venal and destructive in the world. But if I really want to change the world I live in, it's only a half-assed ring toss. If I think that change is possible, and that I could survive the transition, I'd have to try a lot harder and do a lot scarier things.
If you live in that world, don't get the Welcome Wagon ready just yet. It may be a little while before the new neighbor moves in.
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no subject
Date: 2005-09-25 06:03 pm (UTC)Yes there are good things, but for everyone of those that enters my life something ugly comes along fairly quickly.
I try to linger over the good and hurry through the bad. But there is always both, and each has something to teach. Even when I'm not in the mood for learning or just plain don't notice.
no subject
Date: 2005-09-25 06:34 pm (UTC)Far from it. This is a single theory that I have heard, and occasionally lend some credence to, because it certainly seems to hold true for my side of the equation--people continue to behave much as I expect them to.